It was just one glance

It was nearing finals when everyone was frantic. We were all fighting for the same films to watch before our dreaded final just to make up for our lackluster attempts at conquering the class beforehand. It all boiled down to this, the final scramble. I saw you there. Immediately I took notice of you. I would not describe you as particularly gorgeous. I could not say you took my breath away, but there was something. An air of confidence perhaps, or maybe the way you presented yourself, but from then on, I knew. One thing is for sure, I would not describe your looks as revolting, but rather, cute and attractive in a very different kind of way. You introduced yourself, and I did the same. Jeff was your name. I wish I knew your last name. We were trying to watch the same film. You were chivalrous and said that I could watch it first. You gave me as smile. I was nervous. I gave a awkward smile back. Somehow I felt that there was a connection to be created. That was all it took.

I began to search for you in all of my classes. I always sat in the front and I scanned around the room just to get one glance at you. I realized that you were in two of them. Whenever I saw you walk up to the front of the lecture hall, I could not keep my eyes off of you. My heart stopped maybe for the briefest of moments. Then came the dreaded moment when I realized that the two classes were over. Maybe I would not see you any longer, that made my heart yearn. I thought that maybe fate would bring us to meet again on happenstance. Perhaps I would find you again.

Then came a new start, a new quarter, a new beginning. I used the same tactic. I scanned my classrooms just for one sign of your presence. I found it in two of them. I saw you, and again I held my breath. I knew I would always look for you, maybe this time I will be able to sit next to you. Every single lecture, I would turn around awkwardly just to get a simple glance at you. Then one day, I sat relatively close to you on the benches right outside of class. You were reading the newspaper, while I was cramming for our midterm. I looked at you and I put my head down. You looked at me and returned to your newspaper. I wanted to say something without feeling like an idiot, but what could I have done? I felt like an idiot and got up. I walked into the classroom full of shame. Fate seemed to be playing tricks on me again, for I could not summon up the bravery to even say one single word. A simple "hello" could have sufficed.

I missed my chance, but I was not going to allow it to happen again. In our class you actually sat close to me. One row behind me and very near my vicinity. You were talking to your friend. I heard your voice and it made me nervous. I did not know how to act. Fate brought us close to each other again. What was I supposed to do? Do I interject? Do I wait for the perfect moment to say something? Was there even going to be this magical moment? I tried to act as normal as possible. I tried to make myself appear cool and collected. I talked to my friend who sat next to me. Maybe he would notice this time and say something. Nothing ever did happen. I lost my chance again. My courage seems to go down the drain every single time that I know you are around.

What is an attraction anyway? Should I act upon it? I'll let fate decide one more time, only if it is kind enough to give me one more chance.